My Crotch Hurts. For Real.

I’m serious.  It has been the pain in my pubic region that has caused me to be a less frequent blogger.  When pregnant, there is a hormone called relaxin that makes your ligaments more pliable for the baby to get through during birth.  It typically doesn’t start to work until the last month or two, but I got lucky (sarcasm font, where are you?) and mine started around 5 months.  Here is a picture of a ligament that I didn’t know existed until the last few months.

That means that every time I walk, I feel like my pelvis may split in two, or if I sit on a hard chair for more than 2 mins, that when I stand, I’m pretty sure the pain is going to cause me to scream.  So, no more trips to Starbucks to people watch while I write.  Since my computer loves to freeze up, as it’s older, having people to stare at and judge while I wait for my screen to unfreeze, is pretty important.  I’m currently at the library, because their chairs are have a little cushioning.  We’ll see how my crotch feels in a bit.

Other pregnancy fun…

We had a doctor’s appointment yesterday and all is going as planned.  They always say that Josilyn is a very active little lady.  As soon as they find her heart beat, she usually slams her feet into me and flips over.  I imagine it’s like a swimmer’s flip.

Every skinny doctor I have says I’ve gained too much weight (20lbs).  Since I’m already heavy, I should only gain a total of 15-20lbs for the entire pregnancy.  Yesterday’s doctor was explaining to me why I should exercise in general (because, apparently I am a moron, and don’t know that it’s good for me).  When he asked why I wasn’t exercising, I said flatly, “My pubic bone is already spreading and I’m in agony most of the time.  So, no, I’m not going to hit the gym or go for long walks.”  Since he is a he, I wanted to rip his glasses off his face and smash them with my foot while screaming “You have no idea what this feels like, fucker!”  I didn’t.  When he suggested I do water aerobics, I smiled and said, “Yeah, that’s a great idea.”  I will not be doing water aerobics.  I do not have a maternity bathing suit and I don’t have free access to a pool.  Sean and I have started a very strict budget so that we can be great parents, and spending money on a suit isn’t happening, and neither is paying for a membership to go to a pool.  I love swimming… but it’s not happening.  Plus, I’m not worried about shedding the weight, since I had such great success with ViSalus at the beginning of my pregnancy.  While I didn’t know I was pregnant, but taking ViSalus, I dropped over 25lbs.  So, when the skinny doctors tell me I’m gaining to much weight, in the back of my head, I’m also thinking, “You don’t know that I still weigh less than I did when I actually GOT pregnant!”

From crotch, to fat, to skin!  I am so freaking dry!!!  My skin isn’t cracking like it does during Michigan winters, but it itches even more than when it becomes snake skin dry.  It’s super sensitive too.  I hate wearing pants right now.  They make me even more itchy.  I have a few pairs of super soft pajamas that are my at home wardrobe.  When I head out, I wait until the very last minute to put on real pants and typically have them off the minute I sit on the toilet when I get home (because, yes, I have to pee all of the time!).  I’m actually going to get up right now and head to the bathroom so I can lube up my belly.  I don’t think the 16 year old across from me would ever recover if I did it right here.  Although, it may be a great way to promote safe sex!

Oh yeah!  That was AMAZING!!!

The skin situation had gotten so bad that not only have I put pants on my “Five Biggest Threats to Jen” list, I had also become a lotion addict.  A bottle of lotion that typically lasts me two months was used up in a week and a half.  This would have been fine if it was bringing any relief, but it was like meth.  Right after the initial lotion high wore off, all I could think about was when I would get my next hit.  I would sit back and attempt to conserve my lotion, only to find myself reaching out for it 10 minutes later.  I needed help.  I turned to Google.

While these things seem so basic, I have added them to my new skin regimen and have become a normal lotion user again.  No more hot showers.  The closer to tepid I can handle, the less moisture it sucks out of my skin.  I oil up my entire body at the end of the shower, before I even get out, with baby oil. The article said that if I was still wet when it was applied, that more moisture would be held in.  It also said to shower every other day, at most.  This, I can abide by… unfortunately, some other issues have come from the pubic ligament situation.  Whenever I go anywhere, no matter the short amount of time, when I get home to rest my pained crotch, it heats up like an oven.  It is so inflamed, from the inside, that I have a bag of peas to cool it off when it reaches blistering (I’m not exaggerating, it has blistered) hot points.  With this heat, comes added moisture around the pubic area, which then doesn’t smell that great.  So, it’s either stink or itch.  I was clearly going to choose stink… until I came up with my own amazing idea!  BABY POWDER!  It keeps things dry and has a pleasant smell.  I am learning!

Now on to hair!  It has grown at least two inches.  I’m so glad I chose to grow it out.  When it’s short, I get it cut at least once a month… it would have been insane to keep up due to time and cost.

______________________________________________________

TIME FOR BABY SHOWER TALK!!!

Sean and I made an unexpected trip home in late October.  He stayed for one week and I stayed for two weeks.  The focus of the trip was to promote ViSalus (the weight loss meal replacement shake I mentioned before http://www.jenfranklin21.myvi.net) to our Michigan friends.  As I was planning this trip, I was in contact with a lot of people to let them know I would be home, when my friend Maggie (Menezes) Walcott asked if she could throw me a baby shower.  What a SWEETIE!!!  So, her and my mom went in to full and quick planning mode and gave me a gorgeous shower.  So many people came!  I felt totally loved.  It was one of those times when I wished I lived closer, though.  I wanted to spend quality time with everybody that made the effort to come, but it just didn’t work out.  In a perfect world, I could have had a family baby shower and a friends baby shower.  That way I could have had more time to visit with each person.

With so many people, I was blessed with many presents for Josilyn.  The amount that people had chosen to gift us with was so generous.  Again, this was another one of those times I felt a little rushed.  I have been to quite a few baby showers, and I know that when you have to sit there and watch the mom-to-be strain and groan to open all of the gifts, it can get pretty boring.  So, I tried my best to get through them quickly, while also attempting to show any amount of the depth of my gratitude.  With this situation, at least I have Thank You notes to get in some more appreciation.

Other than the time issue, the Baby Shower was PERFECT!  Maggie and Mom did everything with such care and speed, that I couldn’t be more thankful.  I want to be clear here, that the time issue was nothing that could have been changed, unless I moved back to Michigan. 🙂

Maggie had asked what food I might like to have there, and for whatever reason, I wanted meatballs.  I asked, she delivered!!!  Nom nom nom…

Other than the gifts, one of the great things that I got to bring home from the shower were these little envelopes that have notes from everybody.  On the front each one describes a time after baby’s arrival.  A couple of examples; “First night as new parents” and “First Father’s Day for Sean as a dad.”  They are all sealed close, and when those moments arrive, we get to open them and read the note from whatever person got that envelope.  The note inside could have to do with the actual event, or maybe it’s something more general.  I am really looking forward to opening these.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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2 Responses to My Crotch Hurts. For Real.

  1. Maggie W. says:

    Thanks for the baby shower nod. It was a blast, and we loved doing it for you. I’m just thrilled you had a good time. I know that I did; Apart from being able to spend time with you, it was also great catching up with all those reed city peeps that I haven’t seen in ages like Svacha and Davis and Deb S. (who BTW I ran into again at the Breaking Dawn premiere…go twihards). Your pal Erin was also a huge help during meatball baking time. And of course there’s your mummy – who was so much fun to work with that I think we ought to start a party planning business together. (You can do the cupcakes – oh frosting goddess extraordinaire.)

    Your preggers blogs always make me laugh because I forget these things. In fact, today you reminded me that when I was pregnant I had actually started a poem which is perfect timing considering the upcoming holidays. Started, but not finished…so feel free to add in your own days 6-1. Love you…Merry Christmas.

    12 Days ‘Til Due Date (To the tune of “The 12 Days of Christmas”)

    (With feeling)

    On the 12th day ‘til “Due Date” my pregnant body said to me:
    “Get up! You have to pee!”

    On the 11th day ‘til “Due Date”, my pregnant body said to me:
    “You’re starving…no wait, now you’re full.” and
    “Get up! You have to pee!”

    On the 10th day ‘til “Due Date”, my body said to me:

    “Where did all these veins come from?”
    “You’re starving…no wait, now you’re full.” and
    “Get up! You have to pee!”

    On the 9th day ‘til “Due Date”, my body said to me:

    “Good God is it hot in here!”
    “Where did all these veins come from?”
    “You’re starving…no wait, now you’re full.” and
    “Get up! You have to pee!”

    On the 8th day ‘til “Due Date”, my body said to me:

    “When she moves it feels like that scene from ‘Alien’.”
    “Good God is it hot in here!”
    “Where did all these veins come from?”
    “You’re starving…no wait, now you’re full.” and
    “Get up! You have to pee!”

    On the 7th day ‘til “Due Date”, my body said to me:

    “I know I’m only sitting, but I’m out of breath.”
    “When she moves it feels like that scene from ‘Alien’.”
    “Good God is it hot in here!”
    “Where did all these veins come from?”
    “You’re starving…no wait, now you’re full.” and
    “Get up! You have to pee!”

  2. Pingback: So you’re having a baby… here’s some pushy advice for guesstation. | Being Sweet is Rough

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